Her bodyguard; Episode 28.
A week. Two weeks. Three weeks. Four weeks. A month. Two months and finally it’s three months staying away from Aidan like he asked me to.
Have you ever felt that before?
When your heart aches so much, you almost feel it tearing apart?
Ever been in such a situation before I’m your life?
Ever had it eating you up, you almost gave up on everything?
When all you wanted to do before In your life was to just commit suicide but then someone gave you light.
Shine light into your dark world but then the same person took his light away and you’re left all alone over again. The next thing you would want to do is to just die.
Ever being in a situation when you just want to kill someone?
Just want to blame someone for your misfortune but then, you realized there’s no one to blame but yourself for having such a bad luck.
That’s how I feel.
You’ve ever been in a condition where you realized your undying love for someone who did nothing but shattered and broke you into tiny pieces.
I was wrong and I was foolish.
It was never pure attraction. It was never lust. It was LOVE.
I’ve no idea why it took me so much to realize it. Okay maybe I do know but I just denied it cause I couldn’t believe it and now? I’ve no choice but to admit it. I do love him. I’m in love with Aidan and it’s the worst mistake I’ve ever made in my entire life. My biggest mistake and my biggest misfortune cause he’ll never care talk less of loving me.
Then all this emotions. Pain. Lovesick. Regret. Anger. Love. They all lead me to one big darkness. Hatred.
Not for Aidan. No, not for him but for myself.
The hatred is tearing me up and I’m breaking apart slowly.
Soon, I’m afraid I won’t be able to go back again.
I can’t help it. I couldn’t. I can’t help myself but to break further.
And I can’t help not thinking about him either.
It’s almost what I do everyday. Think about him. When I’m sleeping and when I’m not.
I’m weak and I know it’s bad for me but there’s nothing I can do about it.
Hayden. He tried, he really tried so much to help me but he couldn’t.
He has been by me for the past months but I can’t help it, these emotions.
They are killing me and I’m not even stopping them.
Hayden tried to help me forget about Aidan but as time goes by, I break down further apart.
Hayden even took me on a date but I couldn’t stop thinking about Aidan.
How could I not think about him when he’s always few meters away from me?
Caleb. Well, Caleb is still Caleb. My Sweet best friend. He’s now together with the girl he’s in love with.And the girls, well they know nothing.
To the others, I’m fine. Nothing is wrong with me cause I’m always wearing a smile but to me, I’m breaking apart. Hard!
Three months without Sarah. Three months of being a jerk to her.
Three months of hurting her feelings.
Ever being in a situation when you feel you’re doing the right thing, the best thing but you still feel it’s your fault the other party is hurt?
I doubt even if Sarah is hurt, Hayden is really taking care of her and I’m glad. At least she isn’t brooding over me.
Have you ever been in a situation in your life that you’re afraid of losing the one person you truly ever cared about even though you’re the reason the person is away from you in the first place.
I know I pushed her away but I don’t wanna lose her. Not to anyone.
I didn’t push her away willingly.
It’s either I push her away and get to be by her side to protect her or I get close to her then lose the chance of ever seeing her again.
This two emotions together helped me realize something I should have realized a long time ago.
I do more than care about her. I like Sarah, a lot. Like a really lot .
I am not familiar with these feelings but I know I’m not ready to lose her and I’m willing to heal myself cause I’m breaking apart without her. Slowly.
My room door opened and I turned to the door to see two young ladies with bags in their hands walked in.
“Who are you guys? ”
I asked, eyeing them one by one.
“We’re asked to dress you up for the party ”
One of them with black hair uttered and I raised my brows in confusion.
My phone rang and I picked it up immediately. The president.
I muttered, still starring at the two ladies who smiled at me.
“I hope you saw the ladies. They’ll prepare you for the party. I know you’re surprised but don’t be, it’s just a president type of party. Don’t worry angel ”
Before I could talk, he hang up and I sighed, turning to the ladies.
“Shall we? ”
The one with red hair asked and I nodded, sitting on the stool.
They started with my hand. My nails were fixed and coloured in yellow. Three silver rings (Ring finger, forefinger and middle finger) were put in both my right and left hand.
Then a small diamond bracelet on my right hand. It was shining.
Then my face. My eyelashes were fixed and then lipgloss and they also fixed my eyebrows and applied little foundation on my face.
I was given a red dress which was shiny and revealed my back to my waist. The gown swept the floor at the back and front.
I was given red heels to match it and my hair was fixed too.
I stood in front of the mirror as my mouth opened in awe.
Wow. I look really good, really beautiful. A little different.
I put on a good thin necklace and earrings then grabbed my handbag and put my phone in it.
I stood up in the heels and almost fell but the girls were quick to grab me.
I’m used to my sneakers and flat sandals, it’s gonna be hard walking in this.
“This way, ma’am ”
They chuckled and I did same before walking out.
We walked to the elevator door and the door opened revealing my worst nightmare.
Green Grey Eyes.